Photo via jayunsplanet at Flickr.com

The good news is you already know how to celebrate New Year’s Eve––by drinking champagne which you get to call champagne because you live in America, by making jokes about kissing someone at midnight while you search desperately for someone to kiss at midnight, and by claiming the role of the earnest keeper of resolutions adrift in a world of cynics while you drink champagne to forget last year’s neglected resolutions. The other news is Baltimore will still be here on New Year’s Day, humoring your headachey daydreams and wiping away your swiss-cheese memories of the night before.
The Maryland Science Center in the Inner Harbor (601 Light St.) welcomes all circadian traditionalists and their underage companions to join in the Midnight Noon countdown. From 10:00 am to 2:00 pm, local kids and parental science-lovers will observe the changing of the calendar with face-painting, puppets, and the puerile rhythms of the children’s band Milkshake. Admission is free to members. Pricing for non-members varies . I have nothing sarcastic to say about this event.
The city presents its free New Year’s Eve Spectacular at the Inner Harbor Amphitheater (at Pratt and Light Streets) starting at 7:00 pm with soothing a cappella hits from Part Harmony and continuing at 9:00 pm with the generically ambiguous sounds of Blues Therapy. At the precise start of 2010, the sky above the crowded, icy harbor will explode in a terrifying display of recreational firepower. Still-Mayor Sheila Dixon will host the countdown to the New Year, which will be marked not by a dropping ball but rather by cannon loaded with confetti.
For a simultaneously extravagant and martial evening, cough up $75 for admission to the deck of the U.S.S Constellation in the Inner Harbor (Pier 1, 301 E. Pratt St.). In addition to a clear view of the fireworks, your pricey ticket will get you champagne (see above), fancy food, noisemakers, special tours, and so forth. 10:00 pm to 1:00 am. Acquire a ticket here .
Where might we find you next year?